Multiplying Your Influence by Using Good Words

by Dave Kahle

“Sticks and Stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me.”  Do you remember that from your childhood?  It was a response from our parents when we were verbally attacked, criticized, or otherwise made to feel bad by what someone said to us.  It was probably helpful in nudging us off our hurt feelings.  However, like Santa Clause and the Easter Bunny, it was untrue,. 

          The truth lies in the opposite direction. While words may not break our bones, they can have a huge impact on our lives.  On one hand, they can build us up and give us confidence and dedication, and on the other, they can generate feelings of inferiority, a defeated self-image and lead to depression and passivity. 

          Words are our most powerful tool for living a life of fulfillment and purpose.

          The Bible is full of passages that remind of this powerful truth and encourage us to choose our words wisely.

          For example, the Bible is God’s Word.  Not Gods feelings, not God’s actions, not God’s intentions. It is God’s word for a reason.

          God spoke the world into existence. It was His words that formed creation.  (Genesis 1, NIV) 

          Jesus is called the Word.  .. 

          In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was fully God. (John 1: 1, NIV)

          In case there is any confusion, Jesus makes clear how important words are to God:  36 But I tell you that everyone will have to give account on the day of judgment for every empty word they have spoken. 37 For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.” (Matthew 12:36-37 )

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          As with so many other passages, we often relegate the idea to the realm of ‘church” and give ourselves a pass when it comes to our behavior in the marketplace.  But there is no exception here for people in the marketplace.  No where does it say, “This applies to your life, except your business or career.  You don’t have to obey this on the job.”

Applications or Christian businesspeople

If we are going to be serious about our Christianity in the marketplace, it’s clear that we need to think about how we use words, and then put in place some guidelines  to help us use good words well. Here are some suggestions: 

• Words are both spoken and written.  

In our world of instantaneous electronic communication, many of us use far more words in writing via text, email and social media posts, than we speak orally. 

• Make sure that your vision, mission and and values statements refer to God’s ownership of the business. 

Your business is not your business. It belongs to God, and you should say that, in writing, on the foundational documents.  That way, everyone who sees those documents will know where you stand. That’s a great place to use precise words that reflect the glory back to God. 

• Be careful about using words that are critical.  

There are, of course, times when you must correct someone. But we need to be careful about the words we choose and the way we deliver them.  We all have memories of some critical words said to us that have lingered for decades.  

          Years ago, I came across the ” sandwich” method of delivering a critique.  We teach it to people in our Sales Management course:  It means that you sandwich the critique between two layers of positive reinforcement. Start with a layer of positive comment, add your slice of critique, and then end with another layer of positive words.  

          So, for example, you could say to a salesperson in a coaching moment after a sales call:  “John you have a nice, easy way with people that makes them comfortable with you. That will serve you well.  (Positive words) However, when you... CLICK HERE TO READ THE FULL ARTICLE

Churchianity or Christianity?