Q.  I have been receiving your emails and have read several of your books.  I work as an account manager for a large industrial supplier.  I love your strategies and ideas but I haven't found a specific way to overcome my most recent obstacle. Â
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I have been moved around from several successful territories, and now find myself trying to sell to companies that are lead by close friends of my main competitor. Â This competitor is a former employee of our company and is bound and bent to destroy us. Â
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How can I get between him and these contacts that are, in some cases, close friends with him for 20+ years? Â You guys are in my opinion THE best in the business! Â You must have an answer to this.
A. You certainly have a difficult challenge, but not one that is insurmountable.
The fact that your competitor is bent on destroying you probably works in your favor. Â It means that he is likely to make decisions based on emotions, instead of based on good business principles. Â Sooner or later this will catch up with him, and the customers will recognize his motivation. Â Stay above all of that.
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Let me start first with what NOT to do.Â
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1.  Don’t bad mouth your competitor, don’t criticize him or even talk about him.  The focus of your communication should be on the customer’s issues and your company’s ability to help them.  Your attitude should be, particularly in this situation, that the competition is irrelevant.  Now, we both know that not to be the case.  However, the point is that you don’t want to initiate a
conversation with the customer about your competitor. Â And, when the customer brings it up, politely change the subject.Â
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2.  Don’t threaten the existing relationships by trying to take business away from the competitor.  At this point, you will lose all of those attempts to gain business at the competitor’s expense.  You’ll make everyone defensive and uncomfortable.  Remember, he’s had long-standing relationships in these accounts, and is far stronger than you are.  Don’t fight against that
strength.